Sunday, December 11, 2011

Cold and Dark Sunday Morning

It is very early -- barely six a.m.  Yet, I am up having my morning cuppa and putting off making oatmeal which I don't enjoy doing.  However, in a quest for better health  I will do in a little while.  I am alone since Hubs is still snoring away. I wouldn't be awake right now if I could  stay up a bit later but it seems that lately I am turning into a pumpkin about 8:30.  Hubs is into action adventure movies which I am not so I sort of just pass out from boredom.  If I sit and read while he watches, I put myself to sleep so I guess I am doomed to an early bedtime regardless of what I do.  However, it does cause me  to wake up early and here I am.  I have come to enjoy this quiet time before the rush of the day begins.

Last night we were invited to go to an outdoor shopping center close to my daughter's house.  We were going to see Santa for the first time with Beanie.  It was cold, I was concerned because we don't need another ear infection.  However, the line was short and  it didn't take long for us to have our turn.  I won't lie --- it didn't go well.  It was like Beanie knew it was expected of her to reject the whole thing and scream and scream she did.  It made me smile.  My own children didn't like the whole fake Santa thing either and, honestly, neither did I.  I have one photo of me at three taken with a department store Santa that I am keeping at arms length away with the look of sheer terror on my face even though I was smiling.  It was sorta funny and sorta sad.  I remember that photo being taken, though, and how I felt and I never pushed Santa on my kids.  That wasn't our emphasis anyway.  The shopping center was heavily lit and we enjoyed the lights as I continued piling all manner of cover on top of Beanie to keep her warm.  She looked sort of like a little mummy with pink mittens and a pink snowman hat sticking out!  I think she enjoyed it but what she mostly wanted to do was climb the stairs to the bar at the restaurant where we were having dinner.  Nothing like a flight of stairs to zap all the excitement out of Christmas lights, horse drawn carriages and Santa!

As I watched this little child take in all that was being offered I had some of the joy of the Christmas season return to me.  You know, things just aren't the same when you grow up and your children grow up -- the vision is just different which isn't a bad thing but it is different.  It was delightful to see Christmas through the eyes of a child again.

I have spent some time this morning studying the Advent lesson for this week.  We are doing the Advent candle each Sunday evening with Beanie.  Tonight the pink candle, for joy, will be lit and she will be doing the lighting with a lot of assistance, of course.  She seems to be enjoying our little ritual, she has been praying since birth so she very reverently folds her hands and is quiet through the prayer.  I like to think that these candles are as awesome to her as the lights in the shopping center.

As I sit here, with my warm tea, I am aware that the cold darkness of the morning is so representative to me of the quiet time before the birth of the Baby that would change everything like the light and warmth that will come when we light the candles this evening.  To me, lighting these three candles tonight will be more magical and meaningful than all the lights and horse-drawn carriages in the town center.   I hope Beanie feels it as well.

Well, guess it is time to cook that oatmeal -- we are going to early church and I always fast for at least an hour before communion so I best get on with it. Oh yeah, I have to wake up Sleeping Beauty in there, too!  Have a wonderful Sunday!