Friday, May 11, 2018

Homebody or Recluse?

I am noticing that, as I am aging, I am changing in ways I never imagined.  Oh yes, the obvious things like the hair, the waistline (or lack of ),  the newly acquired purple Hurrycane....

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These aren't the things I am talking about.  I am talking about my change in interests and habits and such.

When I was young and when my children were young, I enjoyed all the things younger people enjoy.  I liked going shopping and chatting with the neighbors (sort of, I am an introvert after all) and I absolutely loved going to bookstores.

Well, now the kids are grown, I don't care for shopping anymore, don't really know my neighbors yet (that might be ok!) and the bookstores are all gone.

Online shopping has squelched any desire I had to shop -- I mean, why bother when you can just click a button and it arrives at your door.  Maybe.  Or is dropped by a drone.  Speaking of drones -- we saw one in the neighborhood across the street spying on the traffic at the intersection.  It was scary -- on the same level as those big white wind turbines. 

I digress.

So, have I become a homebody or a recluse?  Seems I don't really want to be anywhere but home.  I like my house to be clean, quiet and sort of dark and cool.  It isn't always that way because of the g-kids who come around but for the most part, I really like it to be serene. 

In our old house we had plantation shutters on the windows.  In this house we have venetian blinds that need to be replaced.  Hubs wants more shutters.  I like the blinds.  They let in more light and they remind me of my youth.  My mother was an ace at making our house seem peaceful and serene and a lot of it had to do with those
blinds.  I am afraid a lot of my reading about minimalism has stuck with me.  I like these minimalist blinds. But, I want new ones, I want my OWN blinds.

I have a routine these days.  It is rather slow and deliberate.  It is almost imperative because of my gimpy knees but it makes me feel like I am in control.  Not much gets set around on the tables and such.  I don't buy magazines anymore so I have eliminated the clutter of that.  The bookstores are all gone, for the most part, so I buy books or check them from the library on my Kindle.  I absolutely love that.

It just seems like I have settled into this odd existence.  So different that it used to be.  But, I like it.  I like the quiet.  I like the world being "out there" with the dreadful traffic and the horrible problems we see everyday in the news and on social media.  I like me being "in here" to keep things simple and serene. 

I wonder what is wrong with me.