Peter, Paul, and Mary - Oh Come Oh Come Emmanuel

And We Wait --

Advent has arrived and I have to say I really look forward to the season.  I try to get the majority of the shopping done prior to the first Sunday so that I can actually enjoy the waiting and the quiet.

 When my children were little I didn't really subscribe to the Advent mindset -- I was caught up in the chaos that begins somewhere around Halloween.  I have to admit, sadly, that I didn't really enjoy their Christmases.  They were too hectic, too much materialism, too much comparison.  I was insecure in my role as a mother and clearly lost focus easily.  Even though I was religious and my children were raised in the church, I was too caught up in the Christmas of the world and I regret it.

However, things are different now.  I have learned to embrace the quiet and the concept of waiting.  I have slowed down -- not because of my advanced age (that is a joke, people) but because I have a new appreciation of time. I don't want to look back at my time and see chaos.

So, today as I blessed our wreath and shared the readings with my youngest granddaughter I took my time.  We didn't rush through, we talked about what I was saying and what the season meant.  We talked about Advent being a time of waiting for something wonderful to come, the birth of Baby Jesus.  I could almost feel time slow down.  It was such a wonderful feeling.

Minimalist Melissa


Lately I have been doing a lot of thinking about my possessions mostly because I am overwhelmed by them.  We don't have a large house and when we moved here we had a place for everything and things were organized and manageable.  However, in a mere seven years something dreadful has happened.

One of the dreadful things that has happened is the sale table at Barnes and Noble.  I have a huge personal library that I will never read.  When I purchased a lot of the books, they seemed interesting but now, not so much.  So, in the last couple of weeks I have culled some of the books and taken them to my neighborhood Half Price Books to sell them.  I didn't get a lot for them but that is ok.  Yes, I could put them on Ebay and try to recoup what I paid for them but that is just an awful lot of bother, now, isn't it?  Other options are to offer them on Goodreads or donate to the library -- both options I might consider -- especially the library.  In any event, I need to make further strides in that area and keep the books that truly mean something to me.

Another dreadful thing that has happened -- magazine subscriptions!  Somehow I have to get my husband to quit subscribing to magazines.  Really.  They are taking over the house!

I also seem to have a problem with purses/handbags.  I put out a question on facebook yesterday asking if I were to only have one purse, what would my friends recommend.  I got a few responses -- all good -- and I think I am considering this:

They come in three sizes and I will probably opt for the large considering I could use it as an overnighter if I chose to. It is weather proof nylon, lined and has leather trim.  It doesn't have lots of pockets inside which I always seem to gravitate toward yet never use. These bags are very popular on the East Coast and not so much here in the south, however, because they are lightweight and water-resistant, I think one would serve me well.  So, this might be on my Christmas list.  First, however, I need to go through my current pile of purses and sort things out.

Shoes are not really an issue.  I used to love to buy shoes but not so much anymore.  I have a pair of black Clark's flats and a pair of tan -- exactly the same, very comfortable and very basic.  I have some sandals, one pair of athletic type shoes and one pair of top siders.  I have a pair of black heels but I don't wear them often.  I will keep them though, just in case the need arises.

I have several silky blouses that are just too big and really, even though I am old, they just smack of "old lady" and they are going away.  Far, far away.  I have a few coordinated items with colored slacks and coordinating blouses -- too, too old lady for me.  So, they will be going.  I am shaping my wardrobe around the basic colors of navy, black, and gray -- I don't like khaki -- and intend to use some accent colors of red, turquoise and possibly pink.  I don't get dressed up anymore in dresses and I think I can dress up the other things I have to serve the purpose if I need to.  I have long comisserated the demise of our "ladylike" dress, complete with gloves but, now that I am living life in the slower, retired, more leisurely lane, I think I might actually enjoy no stockings and no gloves --- soft socks are really nice.   I might consider a black, straight skirt -- I might be able to do that.

As I discussed in an earlier post, I am test driving a new makeup -- Rejuva Minerals and so far I like it.  I placed an order for two foundations, a blush and an eyeshadow.  The blush was not in the order and I called the number, got a real person -- a nice one -- and explained.  She explained to me why the blush was not there -- it was on backorder -- and she expected it to be in stock and shipped by Friday.  I received an email that it was shipped and I should receive it tomorrow.  The reviews of the mascara was very good and so, if I like the blush I will probably order the mascara and an eyeliner and purge the rest of my cosmetics.  I buy the stuff but don't wear it or wear it once or twice and don't like it and then it just piles up in the drawer because I feel bad about buying it and then just throwing it away.  Since I do believe that less is more as we age, I think this amount of makeup will do just fine and I can throw it in a makeup bag and take it with me if I so choose.  I still can't download a photo so visit the site at rejuvaminerals.com.

I am looking for a new pair of dressy jeans and I think I am going to try the ones at Coldwater Creek.  I have seen them on and they are nice.

So, that is what has been on my mind all this week.  Getting rid of things, paring down to what is important and meaningful and making my life easier on the whole.  Once it is done, I guess the trick is to keep up the process -- that may be harder than getting things done to begin with!

New Approach


For sometime I have been interested in a "greener" way of life and have been successful at effecting some change in my home.  I have either disposed of all plastic items or swapped out for a healthier option -- it seems that no matter how much I get rid of, I still have a need for some plastic but it is far less than I used to have.  I have experimented with making homemade laundry detergent which I still do and I prefer cooking from scratch with fresh ingredients rather than using processed foods.  My bread maker has had a good workout this past year although I have had to cut down on making bread because my diabetic husband can't seem to control himself and he over indulges.  However, because of the bread baking, I can't eat loaf bread anymore.  I just don't care for the taste.

So, in light of recent health issues I have turned my attention to personal care products.  I have done quite a bit of reading on the chemicals that go into what we put on our skin and since our skin is our largest organ, everything that goes on also goes in.  I learned in high school that I am allergic to formaldehyde so I can't use nail polishes that contain formaldehyde so, rather than use and pay for a product that doesn't work very well, I opt to not use it at all.  Once in a while I will go for a pedi but not often.  I have never dyed my hair because I have always been concerned about the health concerns involved so I started turning gray at 19 and never covered it up.  I am still ok with that.

So, that brings me to cosmetics and that is a whole new world of toxicity.  Now, I would love to just wash my face, moisturize and go but the reality is that I am a Baby Boomer and if I don't do a little something I run the risk of scaring small children while out and about.  However, I have pared down what I do.  I used to do a lot of exfoliation, cleansing, moisturizing, toning, and treating the wrinkles and fine lines which aren't so fine anymore.  However, after researching many of the drugstore brands I have pretty much banned all of them.  I have been using a lot of Origins products and I can't find much on cosmetic database sites about them so they probably won't be coming back into the house either.  So, I am using this:

 It is castile soap which has an oil base so I am not needing too much moisturizer and what I do use is Aveeno -- plain Aveeno without the soy.  It is working fine and I don't see any ill effects to my skin -- plus I feel squeaky clean.

So, that brings us to makeup.  I have a love/hate relationship with makeup at best.  I love it.  I love to look at it, buy it, organize it but I don't love to use it.  However, there is that thing about scaring children so I need to do something.  I have tried many of the natural/organic makeups and they are all lacking in some way -- mostly that they aren't as natural/organic/pure as they claim to be.  So, after doing some research on www.ewg.org (cosmetic database) I chose to try Rejuva Minerals (www.rejuvaminerals.com)  and sent off for some of their samples.  I received them yesterday, minus one of the items (I don't know why) and I tried them for the first time this morning.  They have a large selection of colors and I, surprisingly, hit on one that works well.  I ordered two different shades but feel that one will be way too light and I haven't tried it yet.  I ordered an eye shadow and a blush but the blush wasn't included and I have sent an email to their customer service.  I hope to hear from them today.  So far my impression is favorable.  The packaging is very pretty -- little cardboard containers with sifter lids.  The product went on well and I haven't itched or gotten red at all.  There doesn't seem to be any scent to it, or none that I have picked up on -- that means I don't smell like dirt.  I wish I could download a photo  because they are really adorable little boxes.  The samples are a bit pricey -- $10 but there is a lot of product in there and definitely worth it.   Since I don't wear makeup every day the sample will last me a while.  If I like the blush when I get it I am going to try the mascara and then will probably purge my entire stash and just switch over.  That approach fits my new "minimalist" mindset and I will be glad to have less to keep up with, especially if these new products fill the bill.

I have been following a blog -- becomingminimalist.com - and it is very interesting and informative with lots of idea about how to simplify your life and declutter.  I have started paring down in many areas and will continue to do so as I like the peace and quiet of having what I need and nothing more.  But...that is another blog entry.

To South Carolina


I have been enjoying the novels of Dorothea Benton Frank since earlier in the year when I listened to "Pawley's Island" on audio book while commuting to my daughter's house daily.  Shopping my own bookshelves -- I always have unread books there waiting for me -- I noticed that I had picked up a copy of "Return to Sullivan's Island" sometime back and since it is the second in a series I decided to pick up the first book and read it.  "Sullivan's Island" was a great read for me -- it switched back and forth between the present and the past -- the past being in the 50's and 60's which brought back memories for me.  It was a very engaging book and I enjoyed it very much but I always enjoy books about families and interpersonal relationships and how they deal with difficulty.  So, when done, I immediately picked up "Return to Sullivan's Island". 

It takes up with all the children in the first book grown with families of their own.  The main character is Beth -- the daughter of Susan, the main character in the first book.  This book is a bit more light hearted with a bit more comic relief even though Beth goes through some rather difficult growing pains.  This is a great book for curling up with on a cool, rainy day because it is an easy book to get "into".  Both books are easy to get into, actually, and I high recommend them both.

I have to say that reading these books about the Lowcountry have made me want to visit Charleston, SC.  I must be on the right track because in a survey discussed on the "Today" show this morning says that Charleston is the number  one choice for smaller city vacation spots. 

Ancestry Abounds --


I love Ancestry.com.  I have done genealogy for a lot of years and all those years of research have never yielded me as much information as I have gotten off Ancestry, mostly recent.  It is amazing the number of photos that I have been able to view and download in just the last year.  The headstone photos below are definitely within my reach as they aren't a very long drive east from where I live.  However, some of the photos of family members I would never have seen if it weren't for kind folks putting them on their Ancestry pages.

This is my 3rd great grandfather, Henry Patrick Conn.  When hearing about him as a child I somehow envisioned a person very much like the wizard in the movie, The Wizard of Oz.  When I found this photo I was surprised at how unwizardly he was but I have to say I think he was rather handsome.  In later photos, it appears that he was much taller than the wizard as well.  I definitely think he shows a lot of his Irish heritage here -- mostly the hat and the shirt.  I have no idea when the photo was taken.

Here is Henry's final resting place marked by a very lovely headstone which I would assume is not original.  The name of the cemetery is Gravel Hill and it is located in Sabine County, Texas.  A number of my relatives are buried here as well.

Meet my 3rd great grandmother, Clarissa Gibson Conn, wife of Henry.  She appears to be tiny, almost child-like.  Her daughter Clarissa Abi Conn was the same way.  In any event, this lady is buried next to her husband and here is her headstone.

Another lovely headstone, also assumed to be more recent but I am not sure.  I wish I could have known these people as I don't know a whole lot about them except they were farmers in East Texas.  They were both descended from Irish/
English ancestors and their names are carried down through the family not unlike most other families of that era.  You can find Patrick's and Clarissa's and Martha's all over the family all the way down to my father, Pat (fondly called Paddy by my grandmother) and a cousin named Martha Ann. 

I just love doing genealogy and being able to find these photos has just made it all the better.  I spend many hours looking at photos and documents and family trees -- it never gets old to me. 

Nancy Drew -- Who Knew?

I have always been a reader.  I don't remember a time in my life that I wasn't a reader.  My daughter's name even came from a book so you can see that reading has had an impact on my life.  I remember as a little kid I watched my mother read the newspaper and was completely fascinated by it -- I would ask her what it felt like to be able to read.  So, when I started reading I never stopped and, in my old age, I truly believe that if you have your health you have everything and if you can read, you can do anything.

So, this year I decided to join two Reading Challenges on Goodreads -- the 2013 Reading Challenge where my goal was 20 books.  I have met and surpassed that goal and I still have a couple of books to finish before the end of the year.  I also joined the pre-1960 Children's Book Challenge.  This challenge requires you to read any children's book that was published prior to 1960 and contains more than 60 pages.  I decided I would read one author and I started with the Bobbsey Twins books but they didn't hold my interest well enough. So, I decided I would try Nancy Drew again and have been completely drawn in.  I had quite a few Nancy Drew books from a book club I belonged to but I could never get "into" them.  My mom read them, my aunt read them, my grandmother read them but I didn't.  However I decided to give them another chance for this challenge and I am really enjoying them.  Today I finished "The Case of the Hidden Staircase".  It was really good and a little spooky.  I really enjoy the settings in these books -- I mean, who doesn't like big mansions with antiques and secret doors and, yes, hidden staircases.  There is just enough intrigue to make you keep reading but not so much to be frightening to younger readers.  They do hold an adults interest and they are very quick reads.  I would recommend to anybody who wants something light that takes you back in time a bit.

So, after finishing "The Case of the Hidden Staircase" I immediately bought the next one in the series for my Nook.  I will be starting "The Bungalow Mystery" tonight!  Review to follow.

2013 Reading Challenge

I was going great guns on my reading challenge for 2013 and then many distractions popped up and the reading fell by the wayside.  However, it is picking up again and I have completed one more book for the 2013 Pre-1960 Children's Book Challenge.

When I was a child I belonged to a Nancy Drew book club but I never read any of the books! My mother loved them and my aunt loved them but me -- yeah, not so much.  However, I revisited them for the book challenge and I was completely taken in by this story and would definitely recommend it.  In fact, I am looking forward to the next title in the series -- The Case of the Hidden Staircase. 

Old Meme Revisited

Taking some time this afternoon to catch up on my blog reading, I was reminded me of an meme I shared a long time ago.  JLSHall at Joysweb decided to revisit this meme and I thought it would be fun to do the same.  In order to participate you google your name and the word "needs" and list the first ten things that come up.  So, here is an updated version of mine.

Melissa needs:

some help -- hmmm.. yeah .. vacuuming comes to mind here.


a bunny and a stove .... uh, ok


to see -- is this prophetic or philosophical or perhaps a reminder that I need to get my eyes tested






make the signed copy of Google maps she uses -- who is supposed to sign it?

to stop wearing -- is this a remark about the blue eye shadow? How rude!

 a home -- what? this isn't home?  Then why am I doing all this vacuuming?

 a straightjacket --  excuse me?  Well, maybe I do.

to focus -- this is true -- Christmas shopping did not go well on Wednesday

help getting her truck on the road  -- well, first I would need a truck.  Hubs won't let me drive his. 

I don't think these responses were as much fun as the first time around.  Oh well, have a go and see how funny your responses are!




 

All Things Family History


I have done genealogy for years -- absolutely years.  I have never, up until now, figured out how to store and organize all the documentation that goes along with it.  I didn't think up the system on my own, I stole it from somebody on YouTube and, I will say, she did a much better job of it than I have.


I have tried everything from file cabinets to notebooks to folders to electronic programs and nothing seems to work for me as well as I would like.  So, when I went looking for a "new" way to do things, I had an open mind and a good thing, too, because I watched this woman organized her records and was slapped in the face by the simplicity of it all.  Why hadn't I thought of it?

The whole idea is filing documentation, in pendaflex folders in portable, plastic file boxes, by the individual.  Each person in your tree has a folder and whatever information you have on that person goes in his/her file.  They are arranged in the file box just like they appear on your ancestor chart.  By doing it this way you have ready access to whatever you have on any person and you can readily see if you need to find a document to add more information to your tree.  Before I tried keeping all my death/birth certificates (and other documents in like fashion) in one folder labelled as such and I had to sift through all of them in order to find one particular one.  This was time consuming and also meant I handled the documents more than necessary.  Those things are expensive so you really don't want to handle them more than you need to.

Now, the lady on the YouTube video did hers with more panache than I have.  I have been reusing file folders that have been used before, not caring if they were color coordinated.  This lady used blue for her male ancestors and pink for her female ancestors.  It looks really nice when put together but, since I have been going "green" for a while, I saw no sense in repurchasing what I already had. 

As I sat and worked on this today, totally trashing my dining room table, I was amazed at the amount of information I have amassed on all those who went before me.  A good deal of it I had forgotten I had.  I was surprised at some of the information and was able to add it to my tree on Ancestry.com right away before I filed it away.  I discovered some copies of pictures that I mulled over for a while -- I never knew these relatives but I feel like I do.  I finally feel like I am getting all my information in some sort of workable order.  Genealogy is a great hobby but, when you get past the four or five generations, the volume of information becomes almost uncontrollable and almost takes on a life of its own.  I feel like I might actually have a shot at taming the beast with this system.  In the new system, it will be so nice to be able to pull a folder and look over the contents without having to sort through tons of material to find something.  Yes, I think this will work.

I have abandoned the project for the evening -- the dust from the paper is making my nose run and I don't need that -- so tomorrow is another day and I will continue then.  I don't want to rush through this process, I want to enjoy it and relish the past.  My mother always chastised my dad for "living in the past" and I guess, to some extent, I do the same but some days, the past is just the place I need to be.

Still Here -- Just Tired

Hi, all! I am still here -- just a little tired.  Things have been very busy lately what with babysitting the Bean and taking care of my health -- both very tiring activities.  I find that when I return home of an evening about all I can do is a shower, a bit of reality tv, some facebook and then I am down for the count.

Speaking of reality tv, I have somehow morphed into watching Honey Boo Boo.  Why you ask?  I have no clue.  This isn't my usual sort of viewing pleasure.  I love the Smithsonian Channel, PBS, The Learning Channel but not Honey Boo Boo.  I have to say, though, it is the ultimate diversion.  For sure.

Facebook has taken on a different approach for me.  I have a love hate relationship with FB -- I really don't like some of the political stuff on there but I have really enjoyed reacquainting myself with people I went through school with.  We have talked about our present lives and we have talked about our childhoods and taken walks down memory lane, dredging up old memories and having a lot of laughs over it.  We have watched our elementary school be torn down -- much to our dismay -- and we have wondered where others are that we haven't heard from in many years.

After one of those walks down memory lane, I seemed to stay on the path for a while.  I was trying to find my  "happy place" and I did -- in the library of my junior high school.  In a previous post, or two, I have discussed attending a "historical" school on a main street that led to downtown San Antonio, in a beautiful, historic neighborhood with gorgeous homes called Monte Vista.

 The school was built in 1923 and many of my family members attended.  It was, in my mind, a beautiful school -- on the outside.  It has been described as a bit "prison-like" on the inside, however, but I never felt that way.  As one who always loved old architecture, I just loved the dark woodwork, the transom windows, the mullioned floor to ceiling windows and the library.  The first floor windows in the photo above are that very library.  Those windows look out on San Pedro and into the neighborhood of beautiful homes across the street.

Now, I always wanted to be a writer and I would spend many long study hall periods studying each house I could see and making up stories of the families that lived in each house.  The stories became very elaborate in my mind but I never seemed to write them down.  What a shame because I believe that they were very good -- in my 14 year old mind.

During this same time, my father was dabbling in movie making.  He created a film that used almost all local talent including a young college student named Helen Hogan.

My twelve year old self thought Miss Hogan was wonderful.  She was elegant, poised,  pretty, and thin!.  She was active in the San Antonio Little Theater scene along with several of the other cast members.  I thought the little theater life was the most glamorous even though I had only been in the theater once for a piano recital.  So, the movie making came and went, as did the cast members.  I grew up and never gave all that much thought until I was recently asked what happened to all those people.  So, the genealogist in me went on a hunt for those elusive cast members.  I knew a several had passed away, one had moved far away and then there was Helen Hogan.  A quick search and I learned that she had married in the 1990's and was living -- yes, in one of those houses that I had made up a story about!

No, none of my stories ever centered around a young socialite of means, a debutant, a budding actress who was active on the civic front and enjoyed starring in her university's dramatic performances.  But, maybe one should have -- sounds like a pretty nice story to me.