Bruce Lewis

Not much to say about this except that the sadness and concern for this family are overwhelming.  I just wanted to share this so that the prayer chain will grow.


http://www.gofundme.com/z45b38zc

Bruce Lewis on the left raising his glass

Bruce is a 50 year old father of two, Hans and Echo a special needs child who was born medically fragile and requires full time intensive medical care at home.  He has a wife, Mundee, who is unable to work to care for Echo.  A few months ago Bruce started having seizure like activity and couldn't work.  On July 10 a diagnosis was finally made and it isn't good.  The doctor's found a golf-ball sized mass on the right side of his brain.  Early indication is that it is malignant and stage 4 but that hasn't been confirmed and won't be until after surgery which is scheduled for Tuesday.  According to Bruce's sister, things are looking rather bleak.  Even best case scenario means a long recovery time with obstacles.

I am posting this here to ask for prayer for this family.  Lots and lots of prayer.  I know I don't have a lot of readers but hopefully some of my readers will take this to heart and ask their own prayer warriors and groups to participate.

The link above is to a gofundme account to raise money for this family.  I am asking for prayer but if you are so called money is, without a doubt, needed.  It doesn't have to be a great deal -- everything helps. I don't think you can just click on the link, I think you will have to cut and copy into a browser -- I couldn't make it work any other way.

So, it makes me so sad to have to share this as this is a very dear family and have had so many obstacles for so long. I am proud to call them my friends.  But, there is power in numbers so, if you are the praying sort, I am asking you for your help.  Thanks in advance.  I will repost with news as I have it.

11 July 1890, 1966

July 11th seems to be a popular day for events.

July 11, 1890 marked the birth of my grandmother-in-law, Charlotte Fore Brinkley.  She was born in Kosse, Limestone County, Texas. She is buried in Prairie Hill Cemetery, Prairie Hill, Texas.

July 11, 1966 also marks the death of her son and my father-in-law, James Otis Brinkley.  He was on a fishing trip at the Texas coast.  He is buried at Ft. Sam Houston National Cemetery, San Antonio, Texas

July 11, 1965 marks the birth of the "young man" mentioned in my first date post.  As far as I know he is still amongst us.

July 11, 1977 also marks the birthdate of a high school beau (did I really say "beau") of my daughter.  Not sure what ever happened to him.
 
As per historyorb.com a few other things happened on this date in history.  Here are just a few.

911 - Signing of the Treaty of Saint-Clair-sur-Epte between Charles the Simple and Rollo of Normandy.

Charles the Simple was the King of Western Francia from 828 until 922.

 1776 - Captain James Cook begins his third voyage

 1848 - London's Waterloo Station opens

 1967 - Kenny Rogers forms 1st Edition


Yes, so, I wonder what is going to happen today?  Hopefully -- nothing of any importance.

Who Knew? Obviously I am Late to the Party

A few months back I signed up for Ebates -- a purchasing site that will pay you back a percentage of the cost of your purchase.  My cousin doesn' trust sites like this but I decided to be the rebel and try it.  I mean, seriously, isn't all of my information out there somewhere anyway?

I honestly don't remember what I bought -- maybe improved record keeping should be a part of my future?  Ah, yes.

Anyway, I bought one thing, thought I would give it a try and, as is typical for me, I promptly forgot about it.  I clearly think that "decluttering" applies to my memory as well as my home. At any rate, I never gave it another thought.

Fast forward to yesterday -- I went to the mailbox in anticipation as I am waiting for a rather important piece of correspondence -- it wasn't there but I did find an envelope from Ebates with a check for $8.16.  I giggled. 

I might be doing all my Christmas shopping through Ebates.  I was very pleased.

And....There Was This One Time....

She woke up with pinkeye.

Yes. Indeed.

I thought pinkeye was a malady of little children with dirty hands. 

Guess not.

I thought it was allergies.

Probably not.

Could it have been the mascara wand I stuck myself with?

Possibly.

I have no idea but it is annoying and now I have to go see the little doctor man this afternoon.

Blah.

Marriage -- Another Viewpoint

Disclaimer -- this is NOT a post about the SCOTUS decision to allow gay marriage in all 50 of the United States.  I am religiously driven not politically driven so I will not be discussing that here.  This is about something else.

Anybody who has read my blog realizes that I am a family history hound.  My research comes and goes in spurts as my interest, time, and available information ebbs and flows.  Right now it is flowing.  One particularly late night last week I had been chasing down some information I hadn't noticed before -- maybe it was something new posted on Ancestry.com or maybe I just hadn't looked closely but there it was.

The Mayflower.  The Mayflower connection I guess that every family historian is curious about and hopes for.  This came from other people's research and I would, of course, have to do my own before I totally lay claim to it but it looks promising.

This leads me to the problem.

This particular branch of my family is the most difficult to prove and, to date, it is the most interesting.  Why is it so hard to prove?  Well, proof requires documentation.  Documentation can be in the form of birth certificates, death certificates, census records, land records, etc.  As you go farther back in the search  these pieces of documentation aren't as forthcoming as you might imagine.  Early census records didn't list each member of the family but rather the head of family and then a counting of the people in the family by gender and age.  So, what does one do when you get farther back?  Family Bibles are always great sources if you are lucky enough to have one.  Published genealogies are generally accepted as proof of lineage with dealing with membership into heritage based groups and societies such as the DAR, The Mayflower Society, DRT, etc.

So, what is the problem you might ask.  My grandmother.  My poor grandmother.  I loved her dearly, still do and now I am very upset over her lack of "paper trail".    I can prove that she was married to my grandfather.  I can prove she had four children, five granddaughters, lived in the same house for close to a  century, I can even find her on the census records.  However, what I can't prove is that she was ever born.  She has no birth certificate as she was born before they were required here in Texas and, even though they became mandatory in 1903, many home births were never recorded anywhere and there were a LOT of home births in the early 1900's.  And, there is no marriage license for her parents.  Don't be shocked. I am not.  And there is not to say there wasn't one, I just can't find it.  Yes, the census records prove that she was born but it doesn't prove parentage and that is the hitch in my giddy-up.


So, early in my quest for Mayflower recognition, I am stopped.  I can prove everything past this point but am stymied early on in the quest.  I am sad first and foremost for my grandmother -- she has no paper trail as a child -- and secondly for me and my daughter and my cousins who would be eligible to flaunt this rich heritage but for the want of a piece of paper.

So, for all my 60's free-loving friends, for all my friends who feel that marriage is too confining, to all my friends who feel that marriage is redundant, to all my friends who ask what importance there is in a piece of paper --- friends -- IT IS IMPORTANT!!!!

For anybody planning to have children under any circumstances -- GET MARRIED!  THE PIECE OF PAPER ISN'T JUST PAPER!!!!

Whether it is a civil union, a religious ceremony, a consentual agreement -- just get the piece of paper.  And keep it.  Put it someplace safe.  Make copies and pass them around the family.  Whatever.  Your grandchildren, great-grandchildren and even your 11th great-granddaughter would really appreciate it.

I am done here. 

Here Comes the Bride - la la la la

Today is our wedding anniversary.  It is our 43rd anniversary.  We were married in Concordia Lutheran Church in San Antonio, Texas at 2:00 pm. The reception was held in the fellowship hall.  As I said on my facebook post this morning -- after 43 years the only advice I can give to young people is don't get married on the 4th of July weekend and don't wear a long sleeved dress in Texas if you feel the a/c in the church is going to give out.  Other than that -- you just have to work it out.  Here are some photos from the auspicious occasion.

You have probably seen these pics before because they are on the computer and I guess I am just too lazy to go scan in others.  They have all turned a nasty orange-y hue but I will tell you that my bridesmaides dresses were a very lovely pale peach color with white flowers.  My grandmother, who made a couple of the dresses, decided to cut out some of the flowers and attach them on top of the dress with pearls.  It was lovely.  They also wore bows in their hair, which I am sure my matron of honor was very fond of, and white gloves.  Remember white gloves?  You can see my matron of honor right next to me in the last photo -- she would be my cousin JSLHall. 

I look exactly the same today except there is more of me and my hair is quite white in the front, darker in the back and hangs to about three inches below my shoulder.  Otherwise, no difference.  I jest, of course.

We celebrated the day last night as I have a meeting at church tonight.  We went to a lovely local restaurant called The Tavern.

Allen had rib eye steak with tomatoes with blue cheese.  I had rotisserie chicken with pecan and wild rice salad.  We had Tres Leche cake for dessert -- one serving shared between us. 

I should have taken photos -- I had the camera but I just don't think about photographing my food.  I should think about that.

Anyway, it was a delightful evening.

Earlier in the day we had company in the form of Dear Daughter and the Bean.  Allen was out working in the yard so Bean thought it would be a good time for a swim.  Makes it sound like I have some sort of outdoor oasis, doesn't it?  Well, here she is lounging away --

It was quite lovely out and I enjoyed sitting out in the nice breeze.  Until later, of course, when the allergies hit complete with chest congestion and swollen eyes.  I am just so pathetic when it comes to allergies. 

Anyway, it was a lovely day!

Walking this Messy Earth by Catherine Valentine

It was the 7th grade when I met Nellie.  We were both new to our junior high school and probably both feeling like little fish in a big pond.  She stood out in the crowd right away because of her beautiful copper penny hair.  We became friends -- not best friends but friends.  She was a very genuinely nice little girl.  Now, I was an only child and very sheltered.  Two of my greatest fears in life were losing my mother and fire.  In 1963, in that 7th grade year, the thing happened that was the culmination of all my fears -- but it didn't happen to me -- it happened to Nellie.  There was a fire and she lost her mother.  I couldn't bear the horror of it but one thing stood out to me -- Nellie's grace with which she bore the burden.  Over the years, through high school, I observed Nellie and how she grew and how confident she became and my mantra was "what would Nellie do" and if I was dealing with something that I deemed particularly difficult I would remind myself that "if Nellie could cope with THAT I can certainly cope with THIS because Nellie went through the worst thing possible".  I have looked at life through Nellie's eyes most of my life.

Nellie and I lost touch over the years until MySpace came into being and I was looking for childhood friends and I found her.  We reconnected there and again on Facebook.  One day I decided it was time to write Nellie a letter and tell her what a profound impact she had on my life. I am glad I did because I would have been forever regretful if I hadn't.  We lost Nellie a little over a year ago and I am still asking myself, during rough days, "what would Nellie do".

Nellie left a beautiful legacy in that of her children, one of which is Catherine Valentine, a young, aspiring writer.  Catherine has written three books -- a children's book "The Waterlady: An Ozark Tale", and two books of poetry "Mothers and Daughters" and the one I am reviewing today, "Walking this Messy Earth".

"Walking this Messy Earth" is a small volume of twenty poems, each one exploring, explaining and/or relishing in the ups and downs of her journey toward God and Christ.  There are moments of despair and joy, self-effacing exploration of doubts and fears, questions of faith and "am I doing it right".  Some of the writings are more child--like and some are more raw and questioning.  All of them are thought provoking and, in my opinion, cover the whole range of emotions of those of faith who are on the same journey -- Catherine just isn't afraid to voice her thoughts which is probably a God-given way for her to learn and make her way.  Questioning and learning is never a bad thing.

One of my favorite poems in the collection is "Christmas".  The first stanza is so indicative of Christmas as we see it --

"A picturesque scene--
the manger and lowly lamb
Christmas and good cheer,
soft lights and presents.
Forgetting the sadness
and the wounds--
a little baby raised to die"

Most time Christmas is just as she describes it -- no thought that with Christmas comes Easter -- no thought to the circle of His life.  This poem certainly brings it all into perspective.

Another offering in the collection -- "Prayers" -- which deals with how to pray -- the right way to pray.  How many people don't pray because they don't feel that they know the "proper" way to pray?

"He hears all -- just speak"

Another that I particularly liked is "Old Faith".  Maybe it is because I am older but as I read this poem I could just hear the tune to "Little Brown Church in the Vale" one of my favorite hymns growing up in my neighborhood Methodist church.   As I read it memories of my time in that church came flooding back and it was good.  Old faith -- so simple.

The poem that stands out to me the most, that touches me the most is "Heart's Want".  It is about her mother.  It is about her acceptance of her mother's passing and realizing that her mother has made the journey and is now in the hands of the Lord.  It is quiet and sad but hopeful and joyous at the same time.

Poetry is very subjective and I believe that everybody gleans from it what they are supposed to -- what is right for them at the time -- and not necessarily what was in the author's head at the time of writing.  To me, poetry invokes mental pictures even more than prose and Catherine's work created some powerful images in my mind.

Clearly this is a collection of faith driven words and thoughts drawn from personal experience.  It is Catherine's journey to this point in her life.  It is uniquely hers yet so undeniably universal -- I feel that anybody who is on a spiritual journey can identify with almost everything in this book.  Because of that I find it to be comforting in that the reader is not alone in his/her thoughts -- a camaraderie of sorts -- journeying hand in hand, so to speak, walking this messy earth.

I did not ask permission to use excerpts from the book but since Catherine asked me to review I assumed it was ok.  Hopefully I won't be in trouble for that.

If you are interested in learning more about Catherine or obtaining a copy of any of her books please visit her at  http://catherinevalentine.wix.com/cvalentinewriter#!blog/cm7y.

In closing I have to add that it is a privilege to know Catherine, to be included in her circle of friends and to have the opportunity to read and review her work.  I am certain that Nellie is so proud of her daughter as am I. I look forward to watching Catherine grow in her life as an author and having the opportunity to enjoy more of her work.

I recommend this book to anyone.

First Date

I remember my first date with the Hubs. 

I was in a rather foul mood that day thanks to another young man who shall remain nameless here.  This other young man and I had a date for that day.  Then we didn't.  Then we did.  Didn't.  I quit answering the phone and went to a girlfriend's house.

My mother came to pick me up and we made a quick run to the grocery store -- the store that Hubs worked at.  I was clearly not a happy camper and the assistant manager kept hanging around the check stand and he asked what was wrong, my mother explained and he said "if I let Allen off work early would you go to the movie with him?"  My mother answered that we would have to ask my dad and he should call in a little while.  Clearly Allen and I had gone completely mute as this exchange between the asst. manager and my mother was going on.   Long story short -- we came home with milk, Cokes, fritos and a date. 

I was just a tad mortified by the whole thing and I am sure Allen was quite anxiety ridden as he was on restriction for ignoring curfew and he had to borrow the car.  I got over it and he somehow managed to get off restriction and get the car so....

We went here --

to see

 and

 and then we sat on the porch and talked until about midnight. 
 
My mother asked if I thought I would go out with him again and I looked her straight in the face and said "Mom, I am probably going to marry him".  Seven years later I did just that.

So, when was this life-changing momentous occasion?  June 26, 1965.  Fifty years ago today.  Did you hear that?  FIFTY YEARS AGO!!!!  How could that be? 

If you are wondering what happened to the other major players in that little scenario well --

The other young man came back a few months later and wanted "to be friends".  I said no.  Regrets?  Yes. We had been friends first and then tried dating.  It didn't work for us but we shouldn't have let go of the friendship.  He ended up marrying a girl I went to high school with -- his second marriage and he has two children.

The assistant manager whose name was Doug was our best man.  We lost touch quite some time ago which is a shame -- he was a nice guy.

My mother passed on in 1996. 

Fifty years ago -- wow.

Unconscious Mutterings

Unconscious Mutterings is a meme hosted by lunanina at http://subliminal.lunanina.com.  I used to do these all the time and then somehow forgot about them.  However, I was reminded on my cousins blog and decided to participate today.  It starts on Sundays but you have all week to participate. So, I am a day late so to speak.

 

Unconscious Mutterings

Free association is described as a "psychonanalytic procedure in which a person is encouraged to give free rein to his or her thoughts and feelings, verbalizing whatever comes into the mind without monitoring its content." Over time, this technique is supposed to help bring forth repressed thoughts and feelings that the person can then work through to gain a better sense of self.
That's an admirable goal, but for the purposes of this excercise, we're just hoping to have a little fun with the technique. Each week I'll post ten words to which you can respond to with the first thing that comes to mind.
"Rules are, there are no rules." There are no right or wrong answers. Don't limit yourself to one word responses; just say everything that pops into your head. AND you don't have to have your words up on Sunday. Take all week if you want! Read the FAQ for more information.


So, here goes

Sunday, June 07, 2015

Week 645

1 day, 7 hours, 50 minutes ago

I say ... and you think ... ?

1. Shack :: Sugar -- 1962 song by Jimmy Gilmer and the Fireballs (really?)
2. Cute ::  hmm..so many things pop into my head -- uh, bunnies
3. Factor ::  algebra
4. Beach ::  relaxing
5. Toddler ::  fun
6. Cups ::  baking
7. Leaning ::  topple
8. Thailand ::  got nothin' here
9. Beanie ::  granddaughter

ok, well, there is my muttering and it appears to be pretty unconscious.  Except for the bunnies.  It is not even 7 o'clock a.m. so I am still reasonably unconscious which would account for some of the answers.

Have a good day!

I Am Not Going to Lie

I am tired.  It was a somewhat emotional day for me for all sorts of silly reasons.  As most everybody knows, my husband and I babysit Bean on the days she is not in school -- three days last year and two this year.  On the days she was in school we picked her up.  Her last day for Pre-K 4 was last Friday but my daughter was still in school all this week so we had Bean all week.  I am not used to having her all day for five days and I knew I would be tired but I really enjoyed it knowing that next year she will be in school five days a week.  We will be picking her up from school but that is so little time together after having had the privilege of having these two years with her.  It hit me at lunch today -- this would be the last lunch I would be making for her -- the last lunch we would be sharing -- the last intense conversation over lunch.  Oh, I know there will be the odd days I will have her, when she is sick or there are school holidays that don't coincide with her mother's days off but it won't be the same.  Oh, the sadness hit like a ton of bricks.  I now have to adjust to my new reality.  I am sure I will be fine but I will miss her and her antics, the long talks, the reading lessons, surgery on the stuffed animals -- all those things.  She is growing up too fast for me.

After I get done with my pity party I have to play catch up.  I have an email to answer (Bonnie!) and a snail mail letter to answer (Mary!).  I am thankful these two friends are patient because I wanted to wait until I could give these correspondences proper attention -- I don't like to try to answer important letters in a rushed manner and these letters are important.  So, that will be the first on my list of things to do starting tomorrow morning.

Next thing is helping Hubs do a little yard work.  We still haven't replaced the tree that fell down and after looking at the whole of the area, we have decided a complete re-do is in order.  Neither one of us is "into" yard work so we are going to make things easier.  Actually, when we had the landscaping done in the back garden it was in an effort to make things easier but the reality of it is, it just became an over abundance of work that neither one of us wants to undertake.  It has become bigger than the two of us together.

There is some sewing to be done and definitely some de-cluttering.  I have done a lot of reading about minimalism and living with what we really need -- not everything we have collected and I am sure this summer will mean a good look at everything that is stuffed in obscure drawers and closet corners.  Some of that will be started tomorrow as well.

I have plans to do some stitching -- hopefully finishing something and then there is the ever ongoing effort to read through my personal library.  I have enough unread books to keep me busy for years -- absolutely years.  So what do I do?  I go to the library.  I have no more room for books so I was thinking an e-reader would be a great idea and it is but I am finding the books to be a little more expensive than I would like to pay.  I do frequent Half Price Books which is great on price but still doesn't solve the problem of too many books.  Yes, I could sell them back but they give you nothing and I would just as soon donate my excess bookage to the library.  There will be some culling of books and more reading -- always reading. 

So, anyway (as Ellen says)  that is what I have been up to for the last couple of weeks and what my foreseeable future looks like.  Hopefully my energy will bounce back after a good nights sleep and I will get back into some sort of a routine.  After two years of spending the majority of my time at somebody else's house I am going to have to reacquaint myself with my own and try to make it meaningful.  I guess I will just have to take it one day at a time and make it work.

Oh, and by the way, I think the new Col. Sanders of KFC fame is creepy! I don't like it!

Have a wonderful Friday and I will see you on the flip side.

Saint Maybe

I just finished "Saint Maybe" by Anne Tyler.  I am not sure, at all, how to review this book.  I enjoyed it and I would recommend it but I am not sure how to describe my feelings about it.

The story begins with the Bedloe family -- a real Beaver Cleaver sort of group.  They seem to have it all together with the parents, Claudia, Danny and Ian.  Slowly but surely the perfection begins to unravel.  Grandma is plagued with arthritis which is progressive.  Grandpa progresses from a rather opinionated man to a weak man.  Claudia is always just on the sidelines -- married with children and living away.  Danny, who is the focus in the beginning, finds love with the beautiful Lucy who comes complete with a shady past, very little background history and two children, Thomas and Agatha -- and a bun it the oven.  Is the bun Danny's?  We never really know.

As the story progresses, Thomas and Agatha become central to Ian as Ian becomes their primary babysitter and consequently more and more involved in their lives.  More than once Lucy is late getting home which squelches Ian's plan with HIS lady love, Cicely.  Lucy's activities seems shady to Ian and he finally decides that she cheating on Danny.  After one evening of Lucy not coming home in time for Ian to meet Cicely, Danny comes home from a party rather drunk and Ian demands that he drive him home in spite of his altered state of being. During this drive home, Ian, angry because of his ruined evening, tells Danny that Lucy is cheating on him. Shortly after this exchange there is an accident killing Danny.  Everyone thinks it was an accident but Ian thinks it was suicide and he feels responsible.  Lucy's death shortly thereafter causes Ian to believe that he was instrumental in both of their passings which just multiplies the guilt.

One particularly low evening Ian stumbles upon the Church of the Second Chance.  It is a non-mainstream church being conducted from a storefront -- but Ian hears the singing and is drawn in.  Here he finds Brother Emmitt who he confesses to and confides in.  Brother Emmett tells Ian that the way to make things right are to devote himself to the children that he feels responsible for making orphans.  That appealed to Ian's sensibilities and for the next 20 years he devotes himself to raising the children with his parents and becoming a master carpenter.  After his mother's passing and the last child, Daphne's, departure from the home, Ian finds his own life in the form of Rita -- a friend of Daphne and the owner/operator of "Clutter Counselor" -- a company who declutters houses.  She was hired by Agatha, now a physician living in California with her husband, to do something about the hoarding conditions that have come to be the norm in the Bedloe household. 

The book ends on an upbeat note with everybody having found their way and happy but for a bit it was a little depressing.  Not depressing enough to stop reading it but you could definitely feel Grandma going downhill health wise, you could feel Grandpa aging, you could feel -- and hear in their voices -- the children growing up -- but at the end it was all ok -- they had made full circle and it proved to be a very satisfying read.