The New Year

We are well into the new year now.  Resolutions have been made and broken.  Diets have begun and failed.  To Do lists have been made and ripped to shreds.  I think the better thing to do is reflect -- on the LAST year.

Last year for me seemed to be a rather hectic thing.  I had lots of things I wanted to do, got very few of them done, was truly unorganized which showed at the holidays and I just generally think I failed at 2016.  That realization has given me pause for reflection.

Reading my cousin's recent blog entry (mlhalldotcom.blogspot.com) made me think about how I would like 2017 to go.  A little better than 2016 I would say.  He talks about not getting caught up in extraneous events and happenings but being more in the moment with things that are more personal.  I like what he says and I agree with his approach.

In the past year I have tried to live my life between doctor's appointments.  Stupid, I know.  It is like, ok, I just had a positive doctor visit so let's see how much living I can get done in the next four months before the NEXT visit.  Of course, the month before the NEXT visit is always fraught with anxiety so that is a waste of precious "ok" time.  I seem to judge time as "ok for now" time until the next time.  Really annoying so I am trying to get past that.  That sort of thinking is SO counterproductive and I waste so much time determining if I am ok or not ok so I can plan how to live and what to prioritize.  Really not good.

This was the year of our latest election and what an election it was.  It was the most mean spirited, back-biting, lying, accusing, disgusting time I have ever seen.  I guess elections can do that to people.  The problem is, people are still doing it! It is like everybody is still in campaign mode!  People, it is over.  Let it go (breaks into song here).  Eight years ago I didn't vote for Obama, I voted for Romney.  I didn't like either of them, I determined my vote based on who made me the least nervous.  Romney didn't win but I didn't go out acting the fool and being obnoxious to people with name calling and be being assinine.  This election I voted for Donald Trump.  Again, I voted for who made the least nervous.  I actually think I voted for Mike Pence.  The point is we all do the best we can under the circumstances, make the best decisions we can based on our concerns and go with it.  In eight years it will be over and we can judge then whether it was good, bad, or ugly.  The one thing I have learned through all this is that you don't really know people until you tangle with them politically.  I have had people that I thought were friends be so degrading and hateful that I no longer communicate with them.  That is sad.  So, the lesson I learned is.......don't talk about politics.  Make your choice, change  your mind, talk to yourself but whatever you do, don't talk to anybody else! Or, maybe you should -- good way to see people as they truly are.

I have also come to understand how I want to spend my time.  I have always been involved in several hobbies -- mostly needlework of some sort.  I used to enjoy it.  I don't really anymore.  I tried to keep doing it anyway because I thought I "should".  Yep -- not gonna do that anymore.  I have decided I don't like any hobbies that make a mess or cause me physical pain.  So, I will be coloring.  A lot.  And reading.  And maybe drawing -- something I have become quite interested in the last few months.  I have also considered taking up painting -- not sure if that is doable but  you know, I can dream.

So, my take on 2017 is going to be like mlhall's -- the year of me.  That sounds selfish but it isn't . I am going to take this year to learn more about "me", to sort out what is really "me", to explore some sides of "me" that have been left unexplored.  Maybe I will try my hand at writing again -- or get deeper into my family history (don't understand DNA at all, BTW).   For certain I am going to be a more regular blogger even though nobody reads it or at least nobody comments. 

So, here's to the year of "me" -- discovering who I am and what I am supposed to be doing at this point in my journey.  Hopefully 2017 will be a kinder, gentler year.